It has been a while that I experience difficulty to write. Again. I was happy a few months ago when I found out that I can write again. Not writing report or logbook but writing my story, writing fiction, writing for balance. However, I began to lose it again. I have lost the taste and the excitement of writing. I don’t blame anyone or anything but I know I must find the reason why it’s happening.
I am busy thinking of something else, mostly my professsional and volunteer work, that even when I have the time and opportunity to write, I don’t have enough preparation, reflection, and thought on it. Some people may be able to ignore it. I can’t make money out of writing but it was more than skill for income. When I try to give and contribute something, writing and now drawing are my way to channel my experience. It’s also a contribution to myself. It’s not much but essential.
I am an introvert person. I like to keep many things to myself. I know that since I was a child. I also know that my parents were afraid that I am losing my mind. Maybe that’s how extrovert and the world in general see the introvert people.
It makes me sad to lost the passion to write personally about my learning process. I am questioning whether professional work and passionate writing can go hand in hand. I thought to become professional, one need to be creative and passionate, but the greater things sometime to follow the procedure, get on with workplan, working on tight budget, etc.
Malang, 19 Januari 2015